Saturday. A day of firsts.
The first time I saw the CDF in person. Potly but approachable. As commander put it, 'A serious man who can take jokes'. He resembles the camp MO from certain angles.
The first time I saw the 6.30pm newscaster, Cai Ying, in person. She looked quite good on TV but she appeared better in person. Sure, she may look old but she still has the looks. She is also skinny. She came along with a man and I assumed that to be her husband.
The first time I served food and cleared plates, much like a waiter. I had to put on a smiley face and pretended that I was really into my job. Think I did my act so well that one of the guests actually asked which food catering company I'm from.
The first time we we didn't watch a movie after buying the tickets. I was really frustrated and bored from all that queueing and waiting. I've been waiting for one too many times this week. I arrived early so as not to be late. But turns out that my efforts were in vain. I don't blame her. I was a fool for not realising that there wasn't enough time for her to buy me food and collect the tickets. I lost interest in the movie after waiting for so long.
The first time she walked out and me and left me alone. I brought her to a quiet place in hope that I could strike up a conversation. She seems uninterested. So I just kept quiet. I'd be better off talking to a wall. At least a wall doesn't give me an uninterested facial expression. I felt real lonely, sitting at the bridge. Everywhere, everyone was in either in pairs, quads or groups. I'm the only idiot alone. Wandering around aimlessly. Maybe she doesn't want to hear me speak. Maybe she has gotten tired of me.
Over the last couple of months, she has been asking me if we were compatible. I never had such a doubt. I wonder why she had such thoughts. I had firm and strong faith in us. She doesn't. She thinks I'm not caring nor loving enough. She doesn't see the efforts I put in. I guess what she wants is blatant expression of care and concern, just like her friends. I'm not 'her friends' and I don't intend to be like them - I am who I am. Her relentless questions and doubts had put a dent in my confidence. Maybe we aren't compatible after all...
Why does she like to ask questions to make me lost confidence? Why does she like to delibrately test my limits of jealousy? Does it pleases her so much to see me green with jealousy? Does she really need that superficial and facial expression of mine to convince her that I love her?
The first time I saw the CDF in person. Potly but approachable. As commander put it, 'A serious man who can take jokes'. He resembles the camp MO from certain angles.
The first time I saw the 6.30pm newscaster, Cai Ying, in person. She looked quite good on TV but she appeared better in person. Sure, she may look old but she still has the looks. She is also skinny. She came along with a man and I assumed that to be her husband.
The first time I served food and cleared plates, much like a waiter. I had to put on a smiley face and pretended that I was really into my job. Think I did my act so well that one of the guests actually asked which food catering company I'm from.
The first time we we didn't watch a movie after buying the tickets. I was really frustrated and bored from all that queueing and waiting. I've been waiting for one too many times this week. I arrived early so as not to be late. But turns out that my efforts were in vain. I don't blame her. I was a fool for not realising that there wasn't enough time for her to buy me food and collect the tickets. I lost interest in the movie after waiting for so long.
The first time she walked out and me and left me alone. I brought her to a quiet place in hope that I could strike up a conversation. She seems uninterested. So I just kept quiet. I'd be better off talking to a wall. At least a wall doesn't give me an uninterested facial expression. I felt real lonely, sitting at the bridge. Everywhere, everyone was in either in pairs, quads or groups. I'm the only idiot alone. Wandering around aimlessly. Maybe she doesn't want to hear me speak. Maybe she has gotten tired of me.
Over the last couple of months, she has been asking me if we were compatible. I never had such a doubt. I wonder why she had such thoughts. I had firm and strong faith in us. She doesn't. She thinks I'm not caring nor loving enough. She doesn't see the efforts I put in. I guess what she wants is blatant expression of care and concern, just like her friends. I'm not 'her friends' and I don't intend to be like them - I am who I am. Her relentless questions and doubts had put a dent in my confidence. Maybe we aren't compatible after all...
Why does she like to ask questions to make me lost confidence? Why does she like to delibrately test my limits of jealousy? Does it pleases her so much to see me green with jealousy? Does she really need that superficial and facial expression of mine to convince her that I love her?
posted by hg @ 12:54
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